New Year's Resolution

One of my New Year's Resolution is to make my appearance a greater priority. That makes me sound bad. It's not as bad as it sounds, though. I'm sanitary. I look presentable. Some people even find me attractive. Most of the time, my eyebrows are shaped. Maybe a week out of a season, I neglect them. Sometimes, my lips are dry because I have to keep them moisturized twice an hour. If I don't do that, in two hours, my lips become, well, not so great. My skin isn't problematic free, but it's clean and within reason. For the most part, I don't break out. I have a clear complexion with slightly red skin on the corners of my cheeks, but my hair covers that area. My skin isn't dry, dull, or overly greased. But I do have some small visible pores and blackheads that I'd like to get rid of. My wardrobe is well-coordinated but also unoriginal and uncreative. I want my fashion style and appearance to reflect my uniqueness and personality. I don't want to change who I am. I just want to refine it.

I think looking my best is within my capabilities. My skin's flaws can easily be corrected with the right, light foundation that'll cover my slight redness on the corners of my face. My eyelashes are short but appear long to some people because they're straight. Because I haven't applied mascara on properly, and my natural look is so appropriate, mascara has never really made an impact. But I imagine with the right eyelash curler, proper lashing technique, and subtle mascara, my eyes can look more sophisticated. My lips are small, but they work. Slathering on a light shade of pink gloss gives me a naturally pulled together look, but I also look really good in mauve matte lipstick shades. My skin is a little pale, so I find bronzer to be really flattering for me. I have great cheekbones. I never blowdry my hair, so it's naturally soft and straight. If I used a straightening iron, it'll make my hair look even better. My hair is layered, but after a few months, it loses its shape. But straightening my hair gives that glamorous look and it really sculpts my face. Unfortunately, although what I've mentioned doesn't take too much time, it's unlikely that I'll incorporate this routine. I think it's more important to be realistic about my plans, so I follow them.

In the morning, I'll add a light moisturizer, sunscreen, sweep on some bronzer, apply a layer of pink gloss or mauve lipstick. Here's my problem: My lips are so dry that, at the moment, I can't wear anything but gloss because lipsticks outline the dryness of my lips. Even when my lips are smooth, it's like the pressure of the lipstick or lip brush aggravates the surface area and it bleeds into all the wrong places. I'm not sure what I should do about that. I make an effort to use products with superior ingredients. Dampening my hair with a little water and a round bristle brush gives me a soft, layered look that emulates the professional results of a straightening iron. I also want to work towards weekly treatments: face mask, hair mask, and lip mask.

Here are my New Year's Resolutions refined:

1. Find my sense of style, something that reflects my uniqueness. I think I need a signature look. (I already have a perfume signature, Gucci. My boyfriend says it suits my personality). Basically glam up my outfits to make it special.

2. Get at least a week's worth of versatile and usable outfits that focus on flattering my petite figure, small bust size, and flat ass. I want to incorporate my old pants standards of owning 1 pair of khakis, 1 pair of blue denim jeans, 1 pair of dark blue denim jeans, and 1 pair of black slacks. I want the khaki pants to be light in color. I want jeans that are part stretchy and flare out for an enhancing effect. Red looks hot on me, so I want to find more red tops. Many of my current tops are three quarter sleeves, and I should've followed my first instincts, which was that I hated them. I want to find tops with materials that cling to my skin in all of the favorable areas. My other challenge is that I have an unusually long mid-drift for someone my height, so a generous portion of my skin is exposed in a disproportionate sort of way. I'm tired of settling for tops like that. Time for a change, bitch! I'm thinking u-shapes, V-shapes, and cinches for starters. Purple is my favorite color, but you would never figure it on based on my wardrobe. My wardrobe should reflect my interests and personality, so more purples. Eggplant purples look a little too intense and dull on me at the same time because the color is strong, but my pale skin really doesn't do it justice. I look much better in a rich violet shade. I'm usually discouraged because purples are a rare color or is incorporated unattractively.

3. Accessorize. Last year I began buying jewelry, not the high end stuff but still beautiful, nonetheless. I'm in desperate need of accessorizing. The closest to accessorizing I get other than a purse, which is required, is my hair tie, which I usually forget at home. I disconnect accessorizing when I put an outfit together. I see it as an ignorable sacrifice, not a subtle but fundamental element.

4. Stop making compromises. I'm usually non-negotiable, but I surrender to fashion's limits. That doesn't reflect who I am at all. I never prioritize time to make an effort and find clothes that'll really reflect who I am. If I'm to expect any progress and reinvention of myself, I need to change my mindset. Again, my fashion sense should reflect who I am: dynamic, multi-dimensional, diverse, uncompromising, strong, expressive, unique, organized, consistent but also unpredictable.

5. When evaluating possible clothes purchase, really consider how it looks on me, not how I want it to look. Be realistic. And follow my first instincts. Over time my repulsion for certain style fades until I border neutral zone. That's also usually not who I am. I'm opinionated.

6. Find a store that sells clothes for my unique figure. I've always found petite clothing stores to be the most unstylish source. They're replicates of the larger sizes for twice the money, and they conceal your figure. In the fashion industry, there aren't too many sizes of small. So smalls are often too tight on me, while I find myself swimming in larger sizes. It's not fair that my size isn't available, but I, of all people, am well aware that life isn't fair. And if I expect any progress or results, I have to find my source.

8. Prioritize my Appearance

I know this statement can be interpreted as really superficial or neglectful on my part. I'm hygienic. Some people think I'm fine as hell. Their words, not mine. I have this tendency of attracting obnoxious guys who ban together and openly express their opinions of me. On the other hand, there are guys who are completely repulsed by me. Those are such extremes. I think I'm attractive...sometimes. But I can always do more. I can afford to improve the complexion of my skin, whiten my teeth, clear my clogged pores, and wear a pink gloss to enhance my natural beauty. A superior haircut sculpts my face shape and improves the overall quality of my appearance. A simple maintenance haircut effortlessly pulls my look together. It's affordable, but I don't commit to it. I plan to change that this year. My goal is to get a haircut at least every two months. It isn't just a luxury. My hair grows quickly, my split ends make brushing my hair difficult, and static and dryness become a daily interference. My goal is to cut my hair before it needs to be done because by then, I'm way overdue. I don't want to be consumed with my appearance, but I know there's more I can do to feel better about myself. My appearance is a part of me. My specific plans are:

1. Get a haircut at least every two months.

I usually wait until there are visible signs that I need a haircut when I'm aware that I should get one a month beforehand. My philosophy was I don't need a haircut, and I need other things, so I'll wait until I have to spend the money. I wait until my hair length creates a visual trick of unhealthy appearance of elongating my face and such severe split ends that my hairbrush gets stuck in my hair. My new and reformed perspective is to get haircuts to maintain a healthy, attractive cut and style.

2. Whiten my teeth with an over-the-counter treatment.

My teeth look a little discolored, and I'm really put off by it. I think whitening my teeth will really brighten up my face. I'm not talking professional treatment. I'm simply planning to buy an over-the-counter remedy.

3. Swipe bronzer on my face and apply pink lip gloss. It's unrealistic for me to commit to a weekly facial, so I'll aim for once a month, using a papaya enzyme mask.